NOW I LAY ME DOWN TO SLEEP

This is the beginning of my story, of my God, who has been faithful throughout my whole life.        

October 1965

As I climbed upon the bathroom sink to get the Mercurochrome  I was a little nervous, as I was told to never get something like this on my own. However, my mom worked and we had a teenage babysitter. Quickly, I opened the lid and put some on my scraped knee, spilling it on the pink rug my mom had just bought for the bathroom.  I immediately felt guilty and tried to get it up. I couldn't.  In my eight year old mind... to think, I would get a spanking was terrifying. I said to myself..."I hope they die before they get home."

Several hours later my sister who was 9, brother 5 and I, 8 sat on our blue sofa as a police officer stood before us, telling us "Your parents have been in an accident and now, they are in heaven".  My sister immediately began to cry, as did my little brother.  I just sat there thinking ..."That doesn't make sense... how could that be true? They drove separate cars."  I imagined them driving their cars and wrecking into each other...how could that even be possible???

Later, that night after going to bed, I wondered what it all meant.  I was soon to find out when my four cousins who lived in another town not too far away came bouncing in on our bed at about 2am.  They begin to tell us the details of the "accident." "We heard it on the radio...Your dad shot and killed your mom and put a gun up to his head and killed himself."  Now, this story made more sense to me, as my parents had been having some trouble the last few months and I had seen some pretty violent scenes. 

Later that night when everything finally settled down I prayed, "Now I lay me down to Sleep...I pray the Lord my soul to keep...If I should die...before I wake...I pray the Lord my soul to take.  I was afraid...what if I die??? I kept repeating, "If I should die before I wake...I pray the Lord my soul to take" If I died...I wanted to go to heaven.  I didn't know much about it but I had heard enough about the other place to know I didn't want to go there.  God was there that night, as I lay in my bed.

To be continued....another time.